What to write / What to write in a wedding card
What to write in a wedding card
A wedding card has one job: to tell two people you are glad for them. It is easy to forget that while staring at a blank card in the car park outside the venue.
The best messages are short and about the couple: a congratulation, one warm or funny line that could only be about these two, and a wish for what comes next. You do not need a poem, a quotation or marriage advice, unless your advice is funny.
Below are messages for close friends, for a son or daughter, for a colleague you barely know, for when you cannot be there and for when you are giving money. They are written for every couple, so they say 'the two of you' and 'you both'. Put their names in wherever you can.
How to write one
Congratulate both of them
You may have known one of them for thirty years and met the other twice, but the card is to the pair. Write to 'you both' and make sure each of them could read it and feel it was meant for them.
Use both names
Open with both first names, spelt the way they spell them. Check the invitation if you are unsure. Do not assume anyone is changing their surname: first names are always safe.
When you only know one of them
Say so kindly, then say what you have seen. 'I've never seen you as happy as you are together' welcomes the person you do not know without claiming a friendship you have not had the chance to build yet.
Say one thing that is true of them
A detail lifts a card out of the pile: how they met, the way one lights up when the other walks in, the terrible puns they share. One line is enough.
Signing from a family
Write as 'we' all the way through, then finish 'with love from all of us' and your first names. Let any child who can hold a pen sign for themselves. It is always the best part of the card.
Keep it short
Two to four sentences. The couple will have a stack of cards to open, probably over tea and toast the next morning, and a few warm lines will stay with them longer than a full page.
Wedding card messages for close friends
You know them well, so let it show. One shared memory is worth more than any amount of polish.
We have watched the two of you from the first awkward introduction to today, and we could not be happier. Congratulations, you wonderful pair. Now pass the confetti.
Congratulations to two of our favourite people. You already made each other better. Today just makes it official.
I've known one of you since we both had terrible haircuts, and I have never seen you as happy as you are together. Congratulations to you both. I'll try not to cry before the starters.
To the two of you: may your home always have a full fridge, a working boiler and plenty of people round the table. We love you both and we're so glad to be here.
Finally. We all knew long before you did. Congratulations, you two, and thank you for giving us an excuse to dance badly.
What to write in a wedding card for a son or daughter
Say you are proud, and welcome the person they are marrying by name.
To our son and the wonderful person he is marrying: we have looked forward to this since the first Sunday lunch you came to together. Welcome to the family, officially. All our love to you both.
To our daughter on her wedding day: we have been proud of you every day of your life, and never more than this one. Look after each other, you two. We love you both very much.
We always hoped you would find someone who looks at you the way we do, as though you are the best thing in the room. You have. Congratulations to you both, with all our love.
It seems five minutes since we were holding the back of your bike seat, and now look at you. We could not be prouder, or fonder of the person you have chosen. Congratulations to you both.
Our advice, for what it's worth: say sorry first, laugh at each other's jokes and give up the last Yorkshire pudding now and then. Congratulations to you both. We love you.
Wedding card messages for a brother or sister
One fond tease, one line you mean, and a welcome for your new brother or sister-in-law.
To my brother and the person brave enough to marry him: congratulations. I have never seen you this happy, and I've known you since you ate crayons.
To my sister on her wedding day: you were my first friend and you are still my best one. I'm so glad you've found someone who sees what I see. Congratulations to you both.
I never thought I'd be this proud of the person who used to hide my shoes. Congratulations to you both. I'm delighted to have one more in the family.
You two are so good together that even I can't find anything to tease you about today. Normal service resumes tomorrow. Congratulations, and all my love.
Welcome to the family, officially. You have already survived our Christmases, so marriage should be a doddle. Congratulations to you both.
Wedding wishes for a colleague or someone you don't know well
Simple and sincere. Nobody expects a speech from the person two desks down.
Congratulations to you both on your wedding. I hope the day is everything you planned and the weather does as it's told.
Many congratulations on your marriage. It has been lovely seeing you so happy these past few months. Enjoy every minute of the day, and of the time off.
Wishing the two of you a very happy wedding day and a long, contented life together. Warmest congratulations.
Congratulations from all of us at work. We hope the day is a joy from start to finish, and we expect photographs when you're back.
I only know one of you, but I've seen how happy you make each other, and that tells me plenty. Congratulations to you both, and every good wish for the day.
What to write in a wedding card when you can't be there
Say sorry once, then make the rest about them. Promise something you will do when they're back.
We are so sorry not to be with you today. We'll be raising a glass at exactly the right time and thinking of you both. Congratulations, and save us a slice of cake.
Gutted to miss it. I'll want every detail: the speeches, the first dance, who cried first. Congratulations to you both, with all my love from afar.
We can't be in the room, but we are cheering you on from here. Have the most wonderful day, and come and see us soon so we can toast you in person.
Thinking of you both today from too many miles away. I hope it is perfect, and that someone takes a great many photographs for those of us who couldn't make it.
So sorry we can't be there to see it. Congratulations, both of you. Dinner is on us when you're back from honeymoon, and we want to see the album.
Wedding wishes for a second marriage or an older couple
No need to mention what came before. Celebrate this wedding and these two people.
How lovely to see two people so plainly delighted with each other. Congratulations to you both. You deserve every bit of this happiness.
You two took your time finding each other, and it was clearly worth the wait. Congratulations on your wedding, and every happiness in the years ahead.
It is a joy to see you both so happy. You each know what matters by now, and you have chosen it. Many congratulations on your marriage.
Congratulations to you both. Love that arrives a little later seems to know its own mind, and yours is a pleasure to be around.
We have never seen either of you smile the way you do together. Congratulations, with love from everyone who has been quietly hoping for this.
Short and simple wedding wishes
For a group card, a gift tag or when a few words are all you want.
Congratulations to you both. We're so happy for you.
Wishing the two of you a wonderful wedding day and a very happy marriage.
To the two of you: congratulations. You have each picked well.
Congratulations on your wedding. We could not be more pleased for the pair of you.
So much love to you both today. Enjoy every minute of it.
Funny wedding card messages
Joke about married life, never about either of them. Their grandparents will read it too.
Congratulations. From today, 'What do you fancy for tea?' is a question you will ask each other roughly twenty thousand times. Choose your answers wisely.
Marriage advice from people who have been at it a while: get two duvets, and agree early on who takes the bins out. Congratulations to you both.
We came for the love story and stayed for the buffet. Congratulations to you both. You make a cracking pair.
May your arguments be short, your holidays long and your sat nav always right. Congratulations, you two.
You're married. Someone is now obliged to listen to how your day went, every single day. Use this power kindly. Congratulations to you both.
Formal wedding card wording
For a manager, a client, an older relative's friends or any wedding where you would wear a hat.
With warmest congratulations on the occasion of your marriage, and every good wish for your future together.
Please accept our sincere congratulations on your wedding. We wish you both a long and happy life together.
Congratulations on your marriage. It is an honour to share the day with you both.
With our very best wishes to you both on your wedding day, and for all the years that follow.
What to write in a wedding card with money
Mention the gift lightly and say what you hope it goes towards. Leave the amount out.
Congratulations to you both. We've put a little something towards the honeymoon. Spend it on something you'll remember, ideally with a sea view.
A small contribution to your new life together. Put it towards the house, the holiday or a very good dinner, whichever comes first. Congratulations and much love.
We wanted to give you something you'd really use, so here is a little towards whatever you are saving for. Congratulations on your wedding, with all our love.
Enclosed: a little something for the honeymoon fund. Have a drink on us somewhere warm and think of us in the drizzle. Congratulations to you both.
Congratulations on your marriage. Please treat yourselves to something for your home with the enclosed, from both of us, with love.
Wedding wishes from the family
Write as 'we' and sign with everyone's first names, children included.
Congratulations from all of us. The whole family is thrilled for you both, and the youngest has not stopped talking about the cake. Here's to a wonderful day and a very happy life together.
With love from our whole noisy household on your wedding day. The children have been practising their dancing for weeks, so consider yourselves warned. Congratulations to you both.
From our family to your brand new one: congratulations. May your home be as full of noise, laughter and odd socks as ours.
All of us send our love and congratulations. We are so happy for the two of you, and so pleased to be there to see it.
Engagement card messages
The wedding may be a year or two off. For now, be pleased for them and ask for the story.
You're engaged. We could not be more delighted for you both. Congratulations, and let the planning (and the relatives' opinions) begin.
Congratulations on your engagement. We had a feeling, and we are so pleased to be right. Much love to you both.
What wonderful news. Enjoy being engaged for a while before anyone asks about dates, venues or seating plans. Congratulations to the two of you.
Congratulations to you both on your engagement. You are so well matched, and we can't wait to celebrate with you.
Brilliant news. Congratulations on your engagement, you two. We want the whole story, start to finish, the moment we see you.
What to leave out
- Jokes about balls and chains, life sentences or it not being too late to run. Someone's nan will read it.
- Any mention of past partners, however fondly meant.
- Hints about babies. What comes next is their business.
- The cost of the wedding, the length of the engagement or how long you waited for the invitation.
- 'Mr and Mrs' or a new surname, unless you know that is what they have chosen.
Questions people ask
How long should a wedding card message be?
Two to four sentences is plenty. Congratulate them, add one line that is about the two of them, and finish with a wish for their life together.
What do you write in a wedding card with money?
Mention it lightly and say what you hope it goes towards: the honeymoon, the house, a good dinner. There is no need to say how much. 'A little something towards the honeymoon' is graceful and clear.
What do you write in a wedding card if you can't go?
Say you are sorry to miss it, congratulate them, and promise something specific, such as a toast at the right time or dinner when they are back. Send it to arrive on or before the day. An animated card sent by WhatsApp or email on the morning means they hear from you on the day itself.
How do you address a wedding card?
Both first names, on the envelope and inside. It suits every couple and saves guessing at titles or surnames. If the invitation came from the two of them, copy the names as they wrote them.
What do you write in a wedding card for someone you don't know well?
Keep it simple and sincere: congratulations to you both, a hope that the day goes beautifully and a wish for the years ahead. Two sentences will do. Do not force a joke with people you have only just met.
Is it all right to write a funny wedding message?
Yes, if you know them well and the joke is kind. Make it about married life in general, the bins and the duvet, and never about one of them. Cards get passed round the family, so write nothing you would not say in front of their grandparents.